P.S. I Lube You – Queen V $5 Vegan Lube Review
$5 Vegan Lube? In This Economy?
Straddling the in between of toy review and makeup, bath & body – yup, it’s a lube review. More specifically, Queen V’s P.S. I Lube You. I’ve been working on a “Big Lube Guide” to pair with my series on Sex Toy Safety, but I figured maybe I should branch out & try some new things and do full blown reviews on those findings. So! Here we are.
And yes – the title is accurate. $5 vegan lube! I did some digging and P.S. I Lube You seems to run between $8-11 online, but I actually encountered this one accidentally – while I was trying to buy tampons at Walmart. Waiting on a SheVibe order – and out of “safe” lube, I gave it a shot. (It’s worth noting that the entire company is cruelty free. Of course, not all of the ingredients in every item are vegan friendly. Luckily, vegans as a whole are used to reading ingredient lists for fun. So, I checked it out out of reflex anyways.)
Buckle up real quick, I have to whip the soapbox out & talk about the brand itself before we can get to the good stuff.
I’d only known the Queen V brand from a few ads I saw watching Hulu – y’know, the “Hail To The V!” ones. They’re “a female-powered team focused on normalizing the conversations surrounding women’s health.” and that’s usually a good thing. (Their Twitter bio says they’re “millennial focused”, and “gynecologist recommended” as well. For the record, I’m their target audience/age group.)
Most of their marketing is focused on self-care and body positivity which is certainly a nice change from “instant shame”. With that said – I’m not big on heavily gendered items, even if they are for vulvas & vaginas. (Hey! Mainstream sex toy companies! Y’all wanna make colors other than pink, purple, and white-person-flesh while we’re at it?)
The Queen V line is unsurprisingly covered in heavily gendered terms. Queens, lady power, I get it – but come on man I’m just tired. (Non-binary AFAB folks & transmasc folks are RIGHT THERE, and still need things for their bits!) You don’t need to put flowers on tampon packages for me to know what they’re for – right? Their product lines are color coded – “maintenance” and “healing” are lime green & blue. Which means all the sexy stuff is neon pink. I don’t care if I’m using Barbie lube, so I wasn’t too bothered. Mostly, the terminology & gendering of personal care items just gets my goat.
Queen V carries everything from probiotics, to ph-balanced cleansing bars, wipes, and sprays – to “sexual enhancement capsules”, period relief bath bombs – and of course, lube. Most of what they sell is shit I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole if I’m being honest. Bottom line – you truly don’t need vulva soap or anything claiming to “erase” a yeast infection. (Unless it’s handed to you by a doctor and you actively have something wrong!) Vulvas don’t & shouldn’t smell like flowers, get fucking used to it.
Also – everything’s phrased as “taking care of your V” and “keeping your queen V happy”. Which I absolutely fucking loathe. Just say vulva. Just say vagina. It’s truly not hard, and I don’t care for the cheeky babytalk bullshit. We’re adults, right – you’re marketing to adults? Normalizing talking about genitals? Fairly sure I stopped using nicknames for genitals before I was out of grade school, my dudes. This might be a plus for some people that aren’t comfortable picking something up that says “THIS IS FOR VAGINAS” on it, but can we all collectively just unlearn the shame around having a vagina, and having sex? Jesus.
Anyways. Now that that’s off my chest I can get to the schmeat & potatoes here. Just y’know, paired with a reminder that lube & sex toys aren’t gender specific (though some are genital-specific) and there’s no shame in having a fucking vagina or talking about it. I promise the main goal of this post is to talk about some affordable lube in hopes that it’s something awesome and accessible, not just an excuse to bitch.
Specs, details, & ingredients:
Queen V: P.S. I Lube You
- Price: $4.98 at Walmart, $9 on Queen V’s website, between $9-11 elsewhere online.
- Size: 3 ounces
- Type: Aloe based, organic “natural gel” – more on that in a second
- Compatible with: latex condoms, body-safe sex toys
- Cruelty free / vegan?: Yes & yes
Ingredients: Aloe Barbadensis Leaf Juice (Aloe Vera), Propanediol, Tremella Fuciformis Extract, Gluconolactone, Sodium Hyaluronate, Quinoa Seed Extract, Hemp Seed Extract, Flax Seed Extract, Green Tea Leaf Extract, Oat Kernel Extract, Hydroxyethycellulose, Xantham Gum, Sodium Benzoate, Potassium Sorbate, Citric Acid
I consider most “natural” lubes to be a category of their own – not always fitting in with the limits of water/silicone/oil based. (Mostly because anything marketed under the “natural” umbrella can be one or none of those things! For example The Butters is natural, but oil based.) In my eyes, most non-oil based “natural/natural gel” lubes tend to perform similarly to water based lubes with some differences in texture, and are safe on the same types of materials. (Always read the packaging to make sure! Some natural lubes aren’t compatible with latex.)
The websites title for P.S. I Lube You says it’s “water based” – though that’s not written on the packaging, or anywhere else on the site. Jury’s out on that I guess. It’s also marked as being “latex friendly” – and claims to “easily wash away with warm water”. Sweet!
The majority of aloe-based lubes I’ve come in contact with are gels – but P.S. I Lube You is fairly runny. Okay, fairly is an understatement. It’s barely thicker than water. (Which is fine for applying directly to orifices, but applying it to an appendage or a toy is a bit of a mess if you’re not quick. P.S. I Lube You can and will drip everywhere.)
That’s fine on paper, what about in practice?
In use, P.S. I Lube You gets the job done. I’m notoriously sensitive to a lot of lubes, condoms, and general things that go in and around vulvas & vaginas – and it didn’t screw me up. The low viscosity keeps things silky without getting sticky too quickly. Like most water-based lubes, it does get a little bit sticky as it dries down – but that’s nothing reapplication can’t fix. (I didn’t have any luck trying to re-activate it with spit like I can with other lubes, though.) Of course, because it’s so thin – I wouldn’t recommend P.S. I Lube You for anal – though it might be okay for smaller buttplugs if it’s all you have available. (However, there’s definitely better lubes for the job!)
P.S. I Lube You isn’t a flavored lube, (and doesn’t contain any fragrance) but if you happen to get any in your mouth the flavor isn’t offensive. (Mostly just tastes like aloe, seen as it’s the main ingredient.) P.S. I Lube You also doesn’t have the weird aftertaste that a lot of more “basic” lubes have.
What I Loved:
- FIVE. DOLLAR. VEGAN. LUBE.
(also vegan) lube runs me about $10+ for 4 ounces. Three ounces for $5? Glycerin free, cruelty free, and made with all plant-based ingredients! Even if it did a half assed job as a lube that alone is a major selling point for me.
P.S. I Lube You is wildly inexpensive compared to lubes with similar ingredients. Beyond that, the fact that I could walk into Walmart and leave with a lube that was actually “good” for me is awesome. Not everyone orders their sexual wellness shit online – or can go to a brick and mortar sex shop. (And even if they do, sometimes $10 lube just isn’t going to happen!)
For example – when I was a teenager my mom would buy me safe sex stuff if I needed it. (Thanks, Mom!) But – if it wasn’t available at Walmart or Target, I wasn’t getting it. (And the selection at either store isn’t known for being incredible.)
- pH balance
All of Queen V’s products “have a healthy pH of 4.5 to 5”. Why’s that important? “Healthy” vaginal pH is acidic – usually around 3.8 to 4.5. (Your pH can also go up to 7 – it all depends on where in your cycle you are.) Using products higher than your vagina’s average pH can result in irritation, itching & burning – and ups the likelihood of letting an infection brew. (Specifically stuff like yeast infections & bacterial vaginosis)
As usual, vagina’s are a delicate ass environment. Knowing P.S. I Lube You has a lower likelihood of messing that up, I’m a fan. (A lot of other “drugstore” lubes have pH’s above 4.5!)
- The packaging
One handed! P.S. I Lube You has a flip top squeeze bottle (with a valve like 90’s Gatorade) that I can manage one-handed. Lube packaging is the bane of my existence more often than not. Not having to struggle or exert a ton of energy to dispense it was a plus. (If you have grip problems, you might benefit from this as well!) However you do have to be fairly careful in the process, especially because of the texture. (I’ll get to that in a second!)
What I Loathed:
- Not displayed with the other “sexual wellness” products.
This kinda sucks. A bit of a nitpick, but worth pointing out. The entire Queen V line at my local Walmart is displayed alongside menstrual products, Summer’s Eve type washes, and Monistat. I originally went looking for P.S. I Lube You at a different Walmart a few days prior in the “family planning” section. Instead, I was greeted by oodles of lube with not-so-ideal ingredients. On my next trip I checked the sexual health section again (and came up with nothing) and decided I’d take a chance and check the tampon aisle. (Luckily, it was there!)
It just…doesn’t make any sense to me & I’m sure plenty of folks are settling for glycerin based lubes not knowing to check for something better for their body two aisles over. Put it with the other lube, damnit! (I’m not sure if this is true for the other drugstores it’s available at, but it’s worth a look.)
- Surprisingly, also the packaging.
I like the flip top and valve in theory, but it typically means that I squirt out way too much accidentally. Annoying. With it being $5 though, at least I feel a little less bad about that happening. Honestly, most lube packaging is irritating in some way. At least this one can be managed one handed! You just have to be careful.
What’s the takeaway here?
Based off of the fact that P.S. I Lube You is the only glycerin-free lube available to me locally? It’s a win. It’s not over the top incredible or the second coming of lube-Jesus, but does the job well without causing any issues and that’s about all I asked for. Not spending $10+ on lube is definitely a plus as well. I’m not sure if I would buy it again in place of other water-based lubes I enjoy, but in a pinch I’m glad it exists. I’d happily recommend P.S. I Lube You to folks on a budget that see lube as an “extra” that they wouldn’t typically splurge on. Accessibility is awesome.
Interested? P.S. I Lube You & other Queen V products are available directly through their website, or in-real-life at Walmart, CVS & Rite-Aid.
What do y’all think? Should I finish my lube guide? Would you be more comfortable buying lube if you didn’t have to go into the condom aisle? Does millennial-yas-queen-marketing grind your gears? Want to suggest something else for me to review? Let me know what’s on your mind in the comments!